I'm really curious to see what people have to say, because I struggled to pick an option on that poll! (I think I ended up choosing "required for both".) For us, it comes down to the ever-unclear answer of "it depends." Our base policy is "everyone meets the pet", but that flexes depending on the pet and humans involved.
For some of our pets, mostly dogs with challenging behaviors, we definitely need everyone to come meet, talk to us, and go through some coaching to make sure everyone in the household is feeling safe and confident about living with this pet. However, I think this should be a conversation too. As a recent example, we had someone interested in adopting a highly-fearful dog who is reactive to strangers and usually requires ~3 meets before trusting a new person enough to allow more than very brief touch. She had no damaging bite history, but was quick to lunge, snap, and nip. For this kind of dog, we usually do a series of meets here at the shelter, but the interested adopter's partner was reluctant to come to the shelter because he finds them depressing and upsetting. After talking, we came up with a plan for the adopter to do the series of meets, the partner to come just once for a walk in the fields across from the shelter in order to set up a neutral first-meet, and for the adopter to plan to continue to be the main handler and caretaker while continuing the introduction process with her partner and adult daughter (who lives in a separate part of the house, duplex-style, so we didn't require any meet.)
That kind of required meet isn't needed for all pets, although I do think making sure that everyone who is going to be living with the new pet knows about and is okay with the new arrival is important. (With a few exceptions, like parents wanting to keep the adoption a surprise for their kids. In that case, we've already met the caretakers and had a chance to talk over expectations with them.) For a lot of pets, that can be via phone, it doesn't need to require an in-person meet unless the other people want to meet the pet first. If other members of the household have worries, we can talk with them and the adopter to try and resolve them.
I do like to assist with a first dog-dog meet someplace neutral, so that folks aren't trying to do that intro in their living room, and so we can talk about what each dog is communicating to the other. I feel like giving people specific things to watch for as they continue the process is helpful, but there are dogs who are not comfortable traveling to the shelter or folks with multiple dogs who aren't up for wrangling them all to the shelter for a meet. Those cases have to be addressed individually. For the multiple dogs, I usually try to describe what behaviors we have seen, and have the adopter bring the dog they think will be the trickiest to match up with the new dog. From there, we can troubleshoot that meet, and talk though other situations they anticipate with their other dogs.
------------------------------
Emme Hones
------------------------------
Original Message:
Sent: 04-29-2022 11:51 AM
From: Kim Domerofski
Subject: Should meet and greets be required before adoption?
Last week, we posted a poll about required Meet and Greets. We received 1,642 responses with the following results:
Almost 3/4 of the respondents require a meet and greet of current pets, household members, or both. Let's dive in a little deeper to learn more from each other.
If your organization requires meet and greets of current pets or household members: What are those requirements and why is it important?
If your organization doesn't require meet and greets: Why not?
Here are some resources about meet and greets:
July 2021 HASS blog post
HSUS' Adopters Welcome Manual - Implementing Policies page 14
What say you?
#AdoptionsandAdoptionPrograms
#Diversity,Equity,InclusionandJustice
------------------------------
Kim Domerofski (she/her)
Community Manager
Maddie's Fund
------------------------------