Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Unfortunately I feel like there are some cats you simply have to wait for them to choose you. Also is it possible he's scared of women but can be befriended by a guy?

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi Bre,  unfortunately he reacts the same to male or female. However he really enjoys the company of other cats. We have started to add some friendly cats to this room to see if that helps. 

Unfortunately I feel like there are some cats you simply have to wait for them to choose you. Also is it possible he's scared of women but can be befriended by a guy?

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi Megan, I've done a lot of research when it comes to working with cats just like this and have had tremendous success. I agree, that he has the potential to be a sweet, loving cat, he just needs the right intervention. It can be very frustrating when they seemingly don't respond to anything. I highly recommend visiting my website, TheSpicyCatProject.com and looking through my videos. I have handled dozens of cats like him. My biggest recommendation is to place a feral box or carrier in his kennel so that you can then close him in it and transport him into a small, quiet and secure room for a one-on-one socialization session. I've found that this alone helps the majority of cats who are aggressive in their kennels, because what they need is one-on-one reassurance that they're safe and for many cats like him trying to reach towards them in a kennel or with a little hand just reinforces their fear. And usually if they open up during this session, they tend to be a lot more confident once back in their kennel, but not always. If he's still scared or aggressive once in a small, quiet room, I would recommend my Bundle and Bond technique, but only if you are confident and comfortable handling a potentially aggressive cat. Again, I have lots of videos on  my website of how I do this with cats of all temperaments, including feral cats. Sometimes these types of cats are too shut down at the shelter to build confidence on their own so you have to get them out of their comfort zone temporarily to help show them there's nothing to be scared of. Let me know if you have any questions and keep me posted!

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi Berlin! I have actually been on your site and utilize it often especially for our fosters with spicy kittens! I know this guy does have potential and he was an indoor cat I am just trying to find a way to make that connection. He is a medium sized room with other shy/timid cats. I have yet to change my work place on here, I now work at a rescue where there are about 20 cages (total) and 5  free roaming rooms. He is in a free roaming room. There is nothing for him to get up high on as the room was designed to be for the shy cats. I have gone in there most of the time to just sit and do work on the computer and talk to them while I am doing something. He has become more relaxed when I am in there and will occasionally come out of the corner to explore. Pupils are not dilated, ears are alert, whiskers are forward. 

Hi Megan, I've done a lot of research when it comes to working with cats just like this and have had tremendous success. I agree, that he has the potential to be a sweet, loving cat, he just needs the right intervention. It can be very frustrating when they seemingly don't respond to anything. I highly recommend visiting my website, TheSpicyCatProject.com and looking through my videos. I have handled dozens of cats like him. My biggest recommendation is to place a feral box or carrier in his kennel so that you can then close him in it and transport him into a small, quiet and secure room for a one-on-one socialization session. I've found that this alone helps the majority of cats who are aggressive in their kennels, because what they need is one-on-one reassurance that they're safe and for many cats like him trying to reach towards them in a kennel or with a little hand just reinforces their fear. And usually if they open up during this session, they tend to be a lot more confident once back in their kennel, but not always. If he's still scared or aggressive once in a small, quiet room, I would recommend my Bundle and Bond technique, but only if you are confident and comfortable handling a potentially aggressive cat. Again, I have lots of videos on  my website of how I do this with cats of all temperaments, including feral cats. Sometimes these types of cats are too shut down at the shelter to build confidence on their own so you have to get them out of their comfort zone temporarily to help show them there's nothing to be scared of. Let me know if you have any questions and keep me posted!

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

@Megan Stalb I love that you have free-roaming rooms, however, with cats who are extremely timid, they can become overwhelmed in large room, and after five months without meaningful progress, he is likely experiencing ongoing emotional stress. At this point, a more intentional and structured approach is needed. I recommend first getting him safely contained in a carrier or feral box. If he enters one on his own, that's ideal; if not, you may need to gently corner him with a towel (and cat gloves if needed) to guide him in. Although this may be stressful initially, the current approach hasn't helped him move forward, and taking this step is important to break the cycle of fear he's been stuck in. Once contained, bring him into a small, quiet bathroom for a one‑on‑one session. Allow him to settle in the carrier for about five minutes, then slowly open it just enough for him to smell the back of your hand as long as he is not showing aggression. If he responds calmly, continue interacting with him in the carrier and offer treats; if he becomes curious, allow him to come out at his own pace. If he remains timid but not aggressive and you feel comfortable, you can use my Superman towel wrap to gently remove him, holding him securely while speaking softly and petting his head. Most cats begin to relax within a few minutes. Although the initial handling may be stressful, I've found this method to be the most effective way to interrupt his prolonged fear‑based behavior. These more advanced techniques are sometimes necessary for cats who have plateaued in their socialization. Additionally, if possible, set up a large dog crate in his free‑roaming room (as long as no other cats have access) with his litter box, food, water, and a hiding box. Keeping him in this smaller, controlled space for a few days and working with him there can make a big difference. Be sure to cover three sides of the crate with a sheet to provide added privacy and help him feel more secure.

Hi Berlin! I have actually been on your site and utilize it often especially for our fosters with spicy kittens! I know this guy does have potential and he was an indoor cat I am just trying to find a way to make that connection. He is a medium sized room with other shy/timid cats. I have yet to change my work place on here, I now work at a rescue where there are about 20 cages (total) and 5  free roaming rooms. He is in a free roaming room. There is nothing for him to get up high on as the room was designed to be for the shy cats. I have gone in there most of the time to just sit and do work on the computer and talk to them while I am doing something. He has become more relaxed when I am in there and will occasionally come out of the corner to explore. Pupils are not dilated, ears are alert, whiskers are forward. 

Hi Megan, I've done a lot of research when it comes to working with cats just like this and have had tremendous success. I agree, that he has the potential to be a sweet, loving cat, he just needs the right intervention. It can be very frustrating when they seemingly don't respond to anything. I highly recommend visiting my website, TheSpicyCatProject.com and looking through my videos. I have handled dozens of cats like him. My biggest recommendation is to place a feral box or carrier in his kennel so that you can then close him in it and transport him into a small, quiet and secure room for a one-on-one socialization session. I've found that this alone helps the majority of cats who are aggressive in their kennels, because what they need is one-on-one reassurance that they're safe and for many cats like him trying to reach towards them in a kennel or with a little hand just reinforces their fear. And usually if they open up during this session, they tend to be a lot more confident once back in their kennel, but not always. If he's still scared or aggressive once in a small, quiet room, I would recommend my Bundle and Bond technique, but only if you are confident and comfortable handling a potentially aggressive cat. Again, I have lots of videos on  my website of how I do this with cats of all temperaments, including feral cats. Sometimes these types of cats are too shut down at the shelter to build confidence on their own so you have to get them out of their comfort zone temporarily to help show them there's nothing to be scared of. Let me know if you have any questions and keep me posted!

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

HI Berlin, 

Thank you for suggestion. While I have only been working with him for a few months he has been with the sanctuary over a year I believe.  Honestly when watching him he is not overwhelmed to be in the room he is rather comfortable and comes out often for food and water. He is more afraid of people but inching ever so slowly in the right direction. I have been able to extend a finger that he smelled on his own accord. No touching but he is getting there. 

@Megan Stalb I love that you have free-roaming rooms, however, with cats who are extremely timid, they can become overwhelmed in large room, and after five months without meaningful progress, he is likely experiencing ongoing emotional stress. At this point, a more intentional and structured approach is needed. I recommend first getting him safely contained in a carrier or feral box. If he enters one on his own, that's ideal; if not, you may need to gently corner him with a towel (and cat gloves if needed) to guide him in. Although this may be stressful initially, the current approach hasn't helped him move forward, and taking this step is important to break the cycle of fear he's been stuck in. Once contained, bring him into a small, quiet bathroom for a one‑on‑one session. Allow him to settle in the carrier for about five minutes, then slowly open it just enough for him to smell the back of your hand as long as he is not showing aggression. If he responds calmly, continue interacting with him in the carrier and offer treats; if he becomes curious, allow him to come out at his own pace. If he remains timid but not aggressive and you feel comfortable, you can use my Superman towel wrap to gently remove him, holding him securely while speaking softly and petting his head. Most cats begin to relax within a few minutes. Although the initial handling may be stressful, I've found this method to be the most effective way to interrupt his prolonged fear‑based behavior. These more advanced techniques are sometimes necessary for cats who have plateaued in their socialization. Additionally, if possible, set up a large dog crate in his free‑roaming room (as long as no other cats have access) with his litter box, food, water, and a hiding box. Keeping him in this smaller, controlled space for a few days and working with him there can make a big difference. Be sure to cover three sides of the crate with a sheet to provide added privacy and help him feel more secure.

Hi Berlin! I have actually been on your site and utilize it often especially for our fosters with spicy kittens! I know this guy does have potential and he was an indoor cat I am just trying to find a way to make that connection. He is a medium sized room with other shy/timid cats. I have yet to change my work place on here, I now work at a rescue where there are about 20 cages (total) and 5  free roaming rooms. He is in a free roaming room. There is nothing for him to get up high on as the room was designed to be for the shy cats. I have gone in there most of the time to just sit and do work on the computer and talk to them while I am doing something. He has become more relaxed when I am in there and will occasionally come out of the corner to explore. Pupils are not dilated, ears are alert, whiskers are forward. 

Hi Megan, I've done a lot of research when it comes to working with cats just like this and have had tremendous success. I agree, that he has the potential to be a sweet, loving cat, he just needs the right intervention. It can be very frustrating when they seemingly don't respond to anything. I highly recommend visiting my website, TheSpicyCatProject.com and looking through my videos. I have handled dozens of cats like him. My biggest recommendation is to place a feral box or carrier in his kennel so that you can then close him in it and transport him into a small, quiet and secure room for a one-on-one socialization session. I've found that this alone helps the majority of cats who are aggressive in their kennels, because what they need is one-on-one reassurance that they're safe and for many cats like him trying to reach towards them in a kennel or with a little hand just reinforces their fear. And usually if they open up during this session, they tend to be a lot more confident once back in their kennel, but not always. If he's still scared or aggressive once in a small, quiet room, I would recommend my Bundle and Bond technique, but only if you are confident and comfortable handling a potentially aggressive cat. Again, I have lots of videos on  my website of how I do this with cats of all temperaments, including feral cats. Sometimes these types of cats are too shut down at the shelter to build confidence on their own so you have to get them out of their comfort zone temporarily to help show them there's nothing to be scared of. Let me know if you have any questions and keep me posted!

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

I completely understand what you're saying, and I agree that he may not seem overwhelmed by the room itself since he does come out to eat when no one is around. What I meant is that the combination of a large space plus human presence is what's overwhelming for him. He's comfortable moving around when the room is empty, but when people enter, the size of the space gives him too many places to retreat to and too much environmental stimulation to process at once. That's why he isn't progressing, he's trying to cope with both the environment and the social stressor at the same time.

By temporarily working with him in a smaller, more controlled space, we remove one of those stressors so he only has to process one challenge at a time: human interaction. This helps reduce his overall stress load and allows him to build confidence with people in a way that isn't possible in a large room. Once he learns that people are safe in a smaller setting, that confidence carries over, and he becomes far less overwhelmed when people are present in the larger room as well. These methods give him the right environment to finally make progress. Some cats truly need that stepwise reduction in stimuli to break the fear cycle and start socializing successfully.

HI Berlin, 

Thank you for suggestion. While I have only been working with him for a few months he has been with the sanctuary over a year I believe.  Honestly when watching him he is not overwhelmed to be in the room he is rather comfortable and comes out often for food and water. He is more afraid of people but inching ever so slowly in the right direction. I have been able to extend a finger that he smelled on his own accord. No touching but he is getting there. 

@Megan Stalb I love that you have free-roaming rooms, however, with cats who are extremely timid, they can become overwhelmed in large room, and after five months without meaningful progress, he is likely experiencing ongoing emotional stress. At this point, a more intentional and structured approach is needed. I recommend first getting him safely contained in a carrier or feral box. If he enters one on his own, that's ideal; if not, you may need to gently corner him with a towel (and cat gloves if needed) to guide him in. Although this may be stressful initially, the current approach hasn't helped him move forward, and taking this step is important to break the cycle of fear he's been stuck in. Once contained, bring him into a small, quiet bathroom for a one‑on‑one session. Allow him to settle in the carrier for about five minutes, then slowly open it just enough for him to smell the back of your hand as long as he is not showing aggression. If he responds calmly, continue interacting with him in the carrier and offer treats; if he becomes curious, allow him to come out at his own pace. If he remains timid but not aggressive and you feel comfortable, you can use my Superman towel wrap to gently remove him, holding him securely while speaking softly and petting his head. Most cats begin to relax within a few minutes. Although the initial handling may be stressful, I've found this method to be the most effective way to interrupt his prolonged fear‑based behavior. These more advanced techniques are sometimes necessary for cats who have plateaued in their socialization. Additionally, if possible, set up a large dog crate in his free‑roaming room (as long as no other cats have access) with his litter box, food, water, and a hiding box. Keeping him in this smaller, controlled space for a few days and working with him there can make a big difference. Be sure to cover three sides of the crate with a sheet to provide added privacy and help him feel more secure.

Hi Berlin! I have actually been on your site and utilize it often especially for our fosters with spicy kittens! I know this guy does have potential and he was an indoor cat I am just trying to find a way to make that connection. He is a medium sized room with other shy/timid cats. I have yet to change my work place on here, I now work at a rescue where there are about 20 cages (total) and 5  free roaming rooms. He is in a free roaming room. There is nothing for him to get up high on as the room was designed to be for the shy cats. I have gone in there most of the time to just sit and do work on the computer and talk to them while I am doing something. He has become more relaxed when I am in there and will occasionally come out of the corner to explore. Pupils are not dilated, ears are alert, whiskers are forward. 

Hi Megan, I've done a lot of research when it comes to working with cats just like this and have had tremendous success. I agree, that he has the potential to be a sweet, loving cat, he just needs the right intervention. It can be very frustrating when they seemingly don't respond to anything. I highly recommend visiting my website, TheSpicyCatProject.com and looking through my videos. I have handled dozens of cats like him. My biggest recommendation is to place a feral box or carrier in his kennel so that you can then close him in it and transport him into a small, quiet and secure room for a one-on-one socialization session. I've found that this alone helps the majority of cats who are aggressive in their kennels, because what they need is one-on-one reassurance that they're safe and for many cats like him trying to reach towards them in a kennel or with a little hand just reinforces their fear. And usually if they open up during this session, they tend to be a lot more confident once back in their kennel, but not always. If he's still scared or aggressive once in a small, quiet room, I would recommend my Bundle and Bond technique, but only if you are confident and comfortable handling a potentially aggressive cat. Again, I have lots of videos on  my website of how I do this with cats of all temperaments, including feral cats. Sometimes these types of cats are too shut down at the shelter to build confidence on their own so you have to get them out of their comfort zone temporarily to help show them there's nothing to be scared of. Let me know if you have any questions and keep me posted!

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi Megan,

Just dropping a few webcasts here that might be helpful!

• Turning Fear into Friendship: Building Trust with Shelter Cats 
   Dr. Jacklyn Ellis at Toronto Humane Society talking about the protocol they've designed for this, which includes foster care

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.  

Hey there!

Another great resource I've found (along with what Kelly posted) was the Fraidy Cat Program mentioned here: Friends For Life's Fraidy Cat . I'm still working on how to apply something like it to my shelter (we don't have free roaming rooms right now, I'm jealous!) but I've found teaching shy cats "ritualized introductions" has been helpful in building their trust and confidence. You will have to find what this cat's particular reinforcer is - you may have to start with just taking steps back and walking away to reinforce.

Good luck!

Hi all, I work a small rescue who houses cats from various backgrounds. At the rescue there is a particular room dedicated to our shy, scared, under socialized feline friends. This being said there is one cat that I have been trying to make friends with (been for over 5 months) who is not going for the normal things that I use. He is not a fan of canned food, Churu, dry food, toys, ect. Does any one have suggestions for a cat that will not come around for food or even toys to work with them. He has the potential to be a loving cat. I am open to just about anything right now. Also should mention he cannot be handled yet, I have used a fake hand (back scratcher) however he NOT a fan as he will immediately hiss and swat then promptly run away.