Thank you for sharing this toolkit-this was extremely insightful. One of the biggest takeaways for me is how clearly it highlights that owner surrender is often tied to personal crisis situations such as housing instability, illness, or financial hardship, rather than a lack of care for the animal.
I really appreciated the emphasis on shifting language and approach. Using phrases like "seeking help" instead of "giving up a pet," and asking open-ended questions, creates a more supportive and less judgmental environment. That shift alone can reduce shame and help build trust between the public and shelters.
Another important point in the toolkit is recognizing staff reactions, biases, and moral distress. It made me realize how critical self-awareness is in these interactions. If staff are overwhelmed or operating from assumptions, it can unintentionally escalate situations instead of helping resolve them. The idea of reframing-asking "what else may be true?"-is a powerful way to approach each situation with empathy rather than judgment.
I also think the focus on accessibility and communication is key. Many people may hesitate to reach out for help because they fear being judged or don't know what resources are available. Creating a system that is not only compassionate but also clearly communicated and easy to navigate can make a significant difference in both preventing surrenders and improving outcomes when surrender is necessary.
Overall, this toolkit reinforces that trauma-informed care is not just about policies, but about changing the culture of how we interact with people. By prioritizing empathy, consistency, and support, shelters can better serve both animals and the people connected to them.
A personal example that connects to this is a dog our rescue helped named Pudge. His owner suddenly passed away, and while the family cared deeply about him, they were unable to take him in due to already having multiple dogs and limited resources. They were visibly struggling-not because they didn't care, but because they felt ashamed that they couldn't help their family member in the way they wanted to. Pudge is a French Bulldog with respiratory issues, and they were worried that a shelter environment would cause him to shut down or decline.
Because our rescue was able to step in, we provided a solution that met both the dog's needs and the family's emotional situation. This experience really reinforced for me what the toolkit discusses-people are often navigating grief, guilt, and overwhelming circumstances all at once.
It also made me reflect on how shame and emotional distress can impact decision-making. I believe that in some cases, animals may be abandoned or dumped not out of neglect, but because the emotional weight of surrendering them in a formal setting feels unbearable. This highlights how important it is for shelters and organizations to create environments that feel supportive, accessible, and free of judgment.
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Debi Olivas
Elle's House
Founder
Bakersfield, CA
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Original Message:
Sent: 04-13-2026 11:24 AM
From: Shoshana Mostoller
Subject: Trauma-Informed Owner Surrender
Hi everyone - a couple of weeks ago there was a great discussion around trauma-informed owner surrender. I wanted to share a toolkit that I created with staff from a municipal shelter in Virginia Beach about how to create a trauma-informed owner surrender program at your shelter. I am attaching the toolkit to this post. Please reach out to me with any questions or suggestions. Thanks!
#EducationandTraining
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Shoshana Mostoller
Director of Programs
My Dog Is My Home
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